Be gentle with yourself. You deserve your love and compassion.

be-gentle-20141217_161804-450Be gentle with yourself. You deserve your love and compassion.

If you’re a perfectionist, or you grew up in a household with a stern, critical, or abusive parent or caretaker, on had a partner who was, then you may struggle–like I have–with being kind and gentle to yourself. You may be harsh to yourself, even cruel. But you deserve your love and compassion; you really do! And when you’re loving with yourself, when you give yourself the same compassion you would a friend, you’ll find that you’re happier and things don’t seem as hard. So try to be gentle with yourself. Don’t push yourself too hard. Think of yourself the way you would a friend. Figure out what you need to feel happier or more at ease, and then allow yourself that.


This can be a hard time of year for many people, so I thought I’d post more positive messages for people again–selfies along with the messages, so people can see the person (and author) behind the message. I think it helps make it more personal and real.

I will try to post photos most days of December for you all. Let me know if you like this idea. :)

And if you like this post, if it speaks to you, I hope you’ll share it with others.

You deserve to be loved and cherished–by others and by yourself.

deserve-loved-20141216_105838-450
You deserve to be loved and cherished–by others and by yourself. I hope you’re treated with love–by your friends and family, by people around you, and by yourself. It’s important both how others treat us, and how we treat ourselves. Keep taking in the love and compassion, and rejecting any ill treatment. You only deserve good things.


This can be a hard time of year for many people, so I thought I’d post more positive messages for people again–selfies along with the messages, so people can see the person (and author) behind the message. I think it helps make it more personal and real.

I will try to post photos most days of December for you all. Let me know if you like this idea. :)

And if you like this post, if it speaks to you, I hope you’ll share it with others.

Follow your dreams. You are worth believing in.

follow-dreams-20141215_141018-450Follow your dreams. You are worth believing in. Whatever it is you want and need to do–then do that. You matter, and your dreams are important. It may take a while to get your dream, so don’t give up. Keep reminding yourself of why you want it, and keep moving forward. It will come.


This can be a hard time of year for many people, so I thought I’d post more positive messages for people again–selfies along with the messages, so people can see the person (and author) behind the message. I think it helps make it more personal and real.

I will try to post photos most days of December for you all. Let me know if you like this idea. :)

And if you like this post, if it speaks to you, I hope you’ll share it with others.

Notice the love around you. Take it in.

notice-love-20141213_105126-450Notice the love around you. Take it in. You may have more love around you than you know. I get love from friends and from my little dog Petal, and they all make up my chosen family. I’ve also experienced kindness, acceptance, and compassion from strangers, acquaintances, and friends, and to me those are all forms of love.

I didn’t grow up with love. My parents abused and tortured me, and so did many other family members and their friends. I was bullied as a child and teen. I was taught to hate myself. So it became hard for me to trust that people could actually like me, never mind love me. But people (and animals) do. And I know they do for you, too.

This time of year especially, or any time that is hard for you, it’s important to take in the love, to not let it bounce off your defenses or reject it.

Notice the love, kindness, and compassion around you. Take it in and really embrace it. You deserve that love, and you’ll feel happier taking it in.


This can be a hard time of year for many people, so I thought I’d post more positive messages for people again–selfies along with the messages, so people can see the person (and author) behind the message. I think it helps make it more personal and real.

I will try to post photos most days of December for you all. Let me know if you like this idea. :)

And if you like this post, if it speaks to you, I hope you’ll share it with others.

Love and accept your body. You’re beautiful as you are.

love-body-20141213_102205-450Love and accept your body. You’re beautiful as you are.

We’re all given constant messages from advertisements and the media that we’re not good enough as we are, that we need to fix or change something about ourselves. But that’s just done to create insecurity so companies can sell products and services, and also sometimes by society to keep some people in power. It’s not based on actual beauty.

You don’t need to change anything; you are beautiful as you are. Truly! Soul shines out of people’s eyes and faces–true beauty–and that’s what draws me to someone. I also see beauty in each of us. If you look at people with an artist’s eye, as well as a compassionate or soul eye, you’ll see the beauty, too. I hope you can look at yourself that way and realize you’re beautiful just as you are.


This can be a hard time of year for many people, so I thought I’d post more positive messages for people again–selfies along with the messages, so people can see the person (and author) behind the message. I think it helps make it more personal and real.

I will try to post photos most days of December for you all. Let me know if you like this idea. :)

And if you like this post, if it speaks to you, I hope you’ll share it with others.

Recognize your progress and triumphs. Celebrate them!

recognize-triumphs-20141212_110849-450Recognize your progress and triumphs. Celebrate them!

Sometimes we forget to take time to see how far we’ve come, or to celebrate our progress. We’re focused on the next goal. But it’s important to take time to appreciate our successes and progress. I hope you see how far you’ve come and what you’ve accomplished, and you celebrate it. Celebrate yourself.


This can be a hard time of year for many people, so I thought I’d post more positive messages for people again–selfies along with the messages, so people can see the person (and author) behind the message. I think it helps make it more personal and real.

I will try to post photos most days of December for you all. Let me know if you like this idea. :)

And if you like this post, if it speaks to you, I hope you’ll share it with others.

Take time to do what makes you feel good or happy. Remember to have fun. :)

take-time-feel-good-20141211_114242-450Take the time to do what makes you feel good or happy. Remember to have fun. :) It’s so important to do things we enjoy, that give us pleasure. So many of us work so hard, we forget about happiness, and joy, and little things that can make us happy we’re here. For me it can be blowing bubbles, hugging a friend, playing with my little dog Petal, reading a book. Noticing a beautiful sunrise, looking at something that feels beautiful, eating chocolate. :) Really being in the moment and enjoying it. Whatever that is for you, whatever brings you good feeling, I hope you keep taking time to do it.

I think it can be especially hard to remember to do feel-good things when you’re going through something stressful, or a crisis, or a hard time of year. But then it’s all the more important to do those things. So keep doing things that remind yourself you’re glad to be here, or that give you some enjoyment, or that help you connect with others. I wish you joy.


This can be a hard time of year for many people, so I thought I’d post more positive messages for people again–selfies along with the messages, so people can see the person (and author) behind the message. I think it helps make it more personal and real.

I will try to post photos most days of December for you all. Let me know if you like this idea. :)

And if you like this post, if it speaks to you, I hope you’ll share it with others.

You are lovable. And you are loved.

you-are-loved-20141210_095553-450You are lovable. Just be being here, by existing in this world, you are lovable. And you are loved.

Take that in for a minute. Sit with it. Believe it. Because it’s true. Even if you feel like no one around you loves you or appreciates you, there are people who do; sometimes we just can’t see it. Don’t forget your animal friends as well; they give us unconditional love. :)

If you were abused or had critical parents, if you’ve experienced bullying or homophobia or racism or hatred directed at you, it may be hard to believe or take in, but it’s important to, if you can. You are lovable, you deserve love and good treatment, and you are loved. I’m glad you’re here. And I hope you are, too.

So let this be my hug to you, even if we never meet in person. I wrap my arms around you tightly, and I say again: “You are loved.”


This can be a hard time of year for many people, so I thought I’d post more positive messages for people again–selfies along with the messages, so people can see the person (and author) behind the message. I think it helps make it more personal and real.

I will try to post photos most days of December for you all. Let me know if you like this idea. :)

And if you like this post, if it speaks to you, I hope you’ll share it with others.

Reach out to the people who love you.

reach-out-20141209_085023-450Reach out to the people who love you. The people you love. They want to hear from you. Whether you’re in a good space or going through a hard time, your friends and others you love want to be there for you and with you. Don’t be afraid to reach out and let them know what’s going on. Think about it in reverse: do you want to hear when someone you love has something happy or something painful going on in their life? Of course you do! So, they do, too.

Keep reaching out to the people who care about you. It’s especially important when you’re going through a hard time. If you can, don’t let yourself get isolated. Keep those connections strong. Because human connection, those bonds we make, help us want to be alive and celebrate life.


This can be a hard time of year for many people, so I thought I’d post more positive messages for people again–selfies along with the messages, so people can see the person (and author) behind the message. I think it helps make it more personal and real.

I will try to post photos most days of December for you all. Let me know if you like this idea. :)

And if you like this post, if it speaks to you, I hope you’ll share it with others.

Allow yourself to take in the good things people say about you–and know they are true.

take-in-good-20141207_185513-450
Allow yourself to take in the good things people say about you–and know they are true.

If you’re a survivor of abuse or if you had critical parents, you may struggle with believing in the good in you, and you may dismiss compliments or positive things others say about you. I do. But when people say good things about you, they mean it, and it’s important to allow the good things in, to really appreciate all the good you do.

One thing that may help you with this is to repeat to yourself the good things other people have said to you. Or write them out (or ask the person to), and then read them over again.

06-take-in-good--you-400


This can be a hard time of year for many people, so I thought I’d post more positive messages for people again–selfies along with the messages, so people can see the person (and author) behind the message. I think it helps make it more personal and real.

I will try to post photos most days of December for you all. Let me know if you like this idea. :)

And if you like this post, if it speaks to you, I hope you’ll share it with others.



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Writing Technique Books & Online Courses I recommend by Holly Lisle


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